It was a lovely, typical Southern California weekend. The sun shone bright and a light breeze cooled the crowd down as we cheered on our children in a competitive game of NFL Play60 Flag Football. Jadyn was eight years old and was the star (if there was even such a thing for his team at that age). Being born in Maryland and being a fan of the now Washington Commanders, it pains me to name the team Jadyn represented. So, in my journey to improve, we will say the team is also known as “God’s Team.” I know, blasphemy, right?
As Jadyn darted through the field, avoiding his flag being pulled and showing shades of a young Barry Sanders, I was cheering him on. As I continued to cheer Jadyn and his team on, a gentleman approached me and said, “Hello, my name is Tony, and I could not help but see you cheering for that young man. Is he your son?” I replied, “Yes.” Tony then proceeded to say, “The only reason I ask is because I saw his last name was Mathaudhu, and I was curious to see if he happened to be related to Sukhdev Mathaudhu.” I smiled and replied, “Yes, he is.”
Tony then spent the rest of the game going down memory lane, celebrating his experiences and the time he spent working with my father at his firm, Mathaudhu Engineering. My father came to this country sponsored by a missionary couple, Bob and Ruby Stahlnecker, better known to my family as Grandpa and Grandma Stahlnecker. He decided to be an engineer despite the school advisor telling him he was not smart enough. He worked 40+ hours a week to send money back to his family in India and pay for his college education. He eventually married the most incredible woman in history and had two amazing sons.
Unfortunately, we lost my dad to cancer on October 2, 2001. My dad happened to be part of the engineering team that entered 3 Mile Island after the nuclear explosion in March 1979, and it hurts to say that all the engineers that entered that day died from some form of cancer.
Being part of a huge family is a blessing. However, we have also experienced loss and pain. In this pain, I would not be honest with myself if I did not admit to talking to God and asking the following questions.
“Why did this happen to me?”
“How come my father never got to experience his grandchildren?”
“Why would you allow this suffering to happen to my family and my mother?”
These are all selfish questions, but understandable, nevertheless. I think it’s human nature to question and ask, “Why me?” but maybe we should not focus on the “me” and instead focus on the “why.”
Our heavenly Father made the ultimate sacrifice and gave his only son so we can be whole and experience God’s love. Romans 5:3-5 says, “Not only that, but we should rejoice in our sufferings, knowing that our suffering produces endurance, and endurance produces character, and character produces hope, and hope does not put us to shame, because God’s love has been poured into our hearts through the Holy Spirit that has been given to us.”
Over the last 20+ years, I have been able to share my experience, in the hope of helping those with their own losses experience healing.
So now, when I ask, “Why me?” I see the healing God has given to and through me.
“Cause what if your blessings come through raindrops?
What if Your healing comes through tears?
And what if the thousand sleepless nights
Are what it takes to know You’re near?
What if my greatest disappointments
Or the aching of this life
Is the revealing of a greater thirst this world can’t satisfy
And what if trials of this life
The rain, the storms, the hardest nights
Are Your mercies in disguise?”
“Blessings” by Laura Story
Suneel and Jessica Mathaudhu are the grateful parents of Jadyn, Aaliyah, and Seline.